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| Photo Credit: Babara Hoffman Photography |
Once our third Daughter was born I knew we were done having children. Our family was complete. We had our beautiful family with three lovely Daughters, and our third Daughter completed the puzzle. When family and friends would ask us or myself if we planned on having another baby to finally have that boy, I would always reply with a "no way, we are finished." Or with a, "our family is complete," or "I am happy with three Daughters and blessed." I really made sure I enjoyed my pregnancy with our third Daughter knowing it was going to be our last. I planned out my birth according to how I wanted it to go one last time.
It wasn't till our youngest Daughter turned two years old I started to feel this odd feeling of emotions of wanting another baby. I never mentioned it to my Husband since he would be all for another baby anytime...seriously. I started gazing through baby rooms on pinterest for fun and often would feel sad when family and friends announced that they were pregnant. I often told myself, "shake it off..what is wrong with you." Then there would be days when I couldn't even fathem wanting another baby. Then one day when I was be able to hold a friends baby and felt so relieved that the baby was not mine, I felt so guilty. At that moment I knew that I was just feeling a void.
That's when it clicked. I started feeling that void when your done having children.
While cleaning out the basement I knew it was time to get rid of the baby stuff, but I am having a hard time parting with it. You know baby objects such as the changing table, high chair, clothes, etc. For now they are tucked away for a garage sale next spring. At least that's what I tell myself and my Husband.
My best advice is to give yourself time. From what I have heard and read, the void doesn't always go away and that does not mean you want a baby. Some of us it may take longer than others. That's okay, if you think about it your body is no longer going to use those God given gifts and talents that were once used during pregnancy, birth and the first year of your baby.
As for myself I am happy with my family of five and our three Daughters.
Have you ever felt the "void?" What have you done to cope? Did you keep it a secret?
3 comments
i tried commenting earlier but i think i screwed something up! just have to say, this is beautifully written! although I am not done having kids yet (that time is just around the corner, tho) my sister is and has shared these same kind of feelings with me. as mother's, i think we all will feel this as some point in our lives and it's nice to know we are normal and not alone. i plan on passing this post on to my sister to read. i'm sure this wasn't the easiest to write, but thank you for sharing!
I agree completely. I wrote about this topic over on Great Moments in Parenting.
I only have one child I've had moments where I've wanted more children or would have liked to have had a bigger family but I just stop and say, there is a reason for everything and thank the higher powers for the one I have. Wondering and dreaming is nice sometimes though.....thanks for such honest share 😉😀
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